Nanny’s Goodbye

Written on September 13, 2023

“Today would have been my Nanny's 89th birthday, or 88th birthday according to her. We lost her back in May. Walking around the house where she lived the final year of her life, the things that caught in my throat the most were the things that were evidence of the end of life for Nanny and the end of 24/7 care for Mama and Daddy. The chair Nanny spent day and night in, once covered with quilts and heated blankets, now bare, the same chair that gave her pressure sores while she refused to lay in her bed. The unfinished puzzle Daddy worked on to pass the time. The calendar with health updates, medicine taken, and how Nanny felt, halted on May 15, the day she passed.

I had always joked that she would outlive me. She had always been a stout, strong-bodied woman, made that way after years of hard labor and a hard life. Her love was not always soft, but it was deep and thorough and it was impossible to miss. Not a day of my life has gone by without me seeing the influence she had on me. She's where I get my stubbornness and, on occasion, my spitefulness. (Mama tells me "that's that Highland in you!", "Highland" being Nanny's maiden name) But she's also where I get my ability to make a friend wherever I go, my love of yard sales, and always needing to keep my hands busy. She's where I learned to love and learned how to be loved and my world got a little dimmer when we lost her. The day before she died, I was able to FaceTime her and tell her I loved her and she was able to tell me she loved me and tried to touch the screen. I'll carry that with me forever.

I was able to go home to Mississippi for 2 weeks back in January and spend time with her and see the home my parents had set up for her right next door to their home, the same house my Daddy was raised in. My parents, in the most beautiful act of selfless love I've ever experienced, saved her from a home that was crumbling around her that she refused to leave (the stubbornness I mentioned earlier) and made her extremely comfortable for her final year of life. I'm so thankful for those 2 weeks and for being able to witness such love.”